Depressed? Maybe, Maybe not..

So, I think I've been going through a couple of days that I've just been feeling down and not myself and not sure if I wanted to NOT feel depressed. So, as down as I have been feeling, I sure got something else to think about today.

How familiar are you with zulily.com? Well, I have made a couple of purchases on there and I have fun looking around and filling up a cart with my dreaming. So, I had been playing in my cart a couple of days ago and had the site up on the computer. Well...

This afternoon before dinner my 3 yr old and my almost 2 yr old had been looking at a video on zulily. I left them watching it multiple times... A short time later, the 2 of them left to go do something else and I looked at the computer screen. It said "Thank You". I really didn't think anything of it until after dinner and I asked my hubby to see what the screen was saying "Thank You" for. Why would a screen say "Thank You" anyway? We sure found out why. There had been a purchase made... It turns out to be a $450. purchase. Oh man was I sure dreaming in that cart. He actually added something in there as well.

As soon as we figured out what had happened, I sent them an email. I'm sure hoping we can get the order cancelled, we'll probably know tomorrow. If that doesn't work, I may list some items on here that I would like to sale. :)

So, if I was feeling bad before, this sure snapped all the self-pity out of me. I'm laughing and crying over the incident (not really much of either one, it's more shock than anything else).

You can now add this to your own lists of things that have never happened to you and things you don't EVER want to have happen to you. :)

So, enjoy that and I'll post soon with the update...



This is what sucked him in. He ended up putting 6 of them in the cart as well before making the purchase. Also to give credit where due, I saved the image from the zulily website.

ETA: What a wonderful thing... They canceled the order no problems!! I'll keep ordering from them. :)

Motherhood Vent

I have had a few things bothering/festering me for a little while now. I'm not sure if I should let these thoughts go viral, but, I guess I've started....

I'm really having a hard time right now. I know everyone seems to have their own things and at their own times, so now seems to be mine. I'm struggling with my oldest child. He has started talking and trying to run away. He also talks back to me or is sassy in his attitude. He can be so nice to his siblings and so helpful to the family and then it's like a switch gets flipped and he's being mean and acting quite naughty.

I'm hoping that by typing this out some thoughts will come to me as to how to handle my current situation.

I thought at one point that I was doing ok as a mom, and then I have my eyes opened and I realize that I'm not really doing that good of a job.

I think I have tried to find out what's really going on, but that doesn't seem to work. I wonder if he just tells me something to placate me.... I love this child and really would like him to be able to talk to me about anything. Maybe he feels like he can't anymore, for whatever reason. I know I have a hard time trusting him because of the lies he tells. Maybe he's stopped trusting me as well?

I've wondered if the changes in the last year have something to do with it. We moved and we now have a new baby. This life sure isn't easy is it?

He is such a good helper when he wants to be. He loves holding the new baby and doing what he can to help him. He can be such a trooper with his younger siblings trying to play in the things that are a little to old for them. He can be so sweet as he comes up and just tells me that he loves me. I am so grateful for this little boy in my life, I just wish it were better more of the time and there weren't any threats of running away or not wanting to be here with me (us) anymore.

For anyone that reads this, thank you for listening to me vent and share some of the thoughts that I'm having. If you have dealt with this or have some ideas for me to try, I'm up for as well. :)

10 YEARS!!

It was 10 years ago today that I married my best friend. I am so lucky to have the life that I do and it all started with that one action 10 years ago.



I'm not a big fan of posting all over the love that I share with my family, I'm not sure why not, but it's just the way I am. As I have thought about this Anniversary, I decided to step out of my zone a little and just mention 10 highlights of my marriage.

1. I literally got to marry my best friend. There wasn't anyone I wanted to spend my time with more than Mike. I am so glad and grateful that this is the way our marriage/life together started. There are still those times occasionally when we stay up late just talking.

2. With him I have 6 beautiful children that I am so grateful to have in my life. He has been able to be to the births of each one and I've loved having him by my side through the labors and deliveries. I could have never delivered those that came without medication without him.

3. He is a very patient with me. I tend to get crazy sometimes and he is able to get me calmed down and recognize the important things.

4. He has the power of the priesthood. I am so grateful for his worthiness to hold and use this power. It has been a major blessing in my life that he has this power.

5. He continues to try and improve himself. We both know that neither one is perfect (although I think he's pretty close :)), and he continues to try to be better and to do better. I appreciate his efforts a lot.

6. He is dedicated to what he wants. He had a goal to loose some weight and he has done very well keeping it off even through my pregnancies when I really don't worry about my weight.

7. He loves me! In spite of everything he still loves me and wants to be with me forever.

8. He provides for us. I am grateful to him for wanting to provide and care for his family. In a time of entitlement he is one that will do anything and everything in his power to provide for his family and to help keep us comfortable.

9. Going along with the last one...he enjoys his job. I'm so grateful for his job. I'm amazed sometimes that he even got it with all the politicking that goes one.

10. He enjoys the time that gets spent with the Hansen Family. I hear horror stories about families and in-laws and I am very grateful for the connectivity that we have with both families.

These are in no particular order, just different thoughts that I have.

Welcome To The World

I haven't been doing to well at keeping things up to date around here. I need to do a TON of updating, but for now I will start with the biggest news.

We are now a family of 8. Our #5 son arrived on the 25th.

I'm not sure how many of the lovely details I should share, but I think I can cover the story for anyone who is interested in details.

I was due Aug. 18th, so this really was a little bit of a shock to have our baby arrive 3 1/2 wks early. So, this story starts Tuesday....

We had gone up to the Air Force Museum to spend some time there with Mike's parents and one of his brothers and their family. When we arrived I had more aches and pains and I walked slow, but other than that, things were good. We wandered around and followed the kids :). It was quite hot in there with not enough air flow (in my opinion).






As we were getting done and heading out, I found myself not feeling well at all. I started feeling weak, tired and a little light-headed. I figured I was a little dehydrated and so I was trying to drink the water that we did have. We went back to Mike's parents house and I really wasn't doing well. Mike helped me down to the basement and I layed down and went in and out of sleep. Later I started to wonder about temperature. I started to feel chilly and started thinking that maybe we should be heading to the hospital, especially if I do have a fever.

We ended up leaving Mike's parents at about 7:30. During the drive home, I started having contractions. We decided about Bountiful area that we better head straight to the hospital. I wanted to be home. So we dropped the kids off at a friends house. (Thank you Peterson's!!) We headed to the hospital and got into a room and we found out that I had a fever of 102. The contractions weren't doing anything, so the big thing was my fever and after doing more testing, my white blood count. So we ended up doing more extensive testing and figuring out that I had an infection, but we didn't know where. They kept me overnight and we started a round of antibiotics to help me. Then they just monitored me for awhile to see how things were going.

The next afternoon Mike left to take care of kids and get things figured out here at home. From talking to the nurse we figured the Dr. would be in around 4:30 and he would probably just send me home, so that's pretty much what we figured would happen. Well, come about 4:00 I was on the monitors again and I started to notice contractions more... I had been sleeping off and on and probably didn't notice them until now. By about 4:30, the Dr. wasn't there yet and I was really dealing with contractions so the nurse decided to check me...I was a 5. We were having a baby. So, I called Mike (it felt like a million times trying to get a hold of him) and told him that I was at a 5 and he needed to get to the hospital now. With the nurse I decided that I would get an epidural (I've never had one before), so I could make it through. With not sleeping well and not feeling well, I wasn't sure how long I could handle what was going on. So, Mike walks in as they are prepping me for the epidural and the Dr. walks in about 5 min. after that.

Side not about my epidural... it took way to long and I'm still not sure if it was worth it in the end or not to have gotten it. So, as the anesthesiologist was finishing up, I told everyone that we had a problem...the baby was coming now! So, they hurried to get me laying down so the Dr. could check me and I was complete. I've never sat complete before without delivering, so that was new and probably a good thing because the Dr. still needed to get covered up and there wasn't anyone yet there from the nursery.

Next thing you know, we are delivering and we have a beautiful new baby boy. It was a 1hr 22min labor. He came 3 1/2 wks early weighing 7lb 2oz. I think I'm glad he didn't come at 40 wks, he may have been 9lbs. :) He was 20in long. He did have a temp after being born, probably because of mine. After a couple of hours he was doing just fine and they were able to bring him to me in my room. As of right now, we are thinking that the infection was in my placenta. During delivery it started to tear away from the uterine wall and they did send it to get tested, but I haven't heard yet. I was still running a temp and so I got some rounds of antibiotics to help me get better. We were excited when my temp got down below 100. ;)

Everything ended up going very well and we were both able to come home on Friday (there was a chance that I wasn't going to be able to). We are so glad to have #5 here in our family. The kids love to hold him and want to be with him all the time. It's amazing how much love you can have for all of your children.

Each child sure comes into this world their own way and in their own time. I'm so grateful for each one of my children and the impact that they have on my life. I don't have any pictures right now of the kids with him, but I do have some of just him so I will add them here. :)